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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Amusing Online Famous Quotations - 27
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Walter Winchell
Remember that nobody will ever get ahead of you as long as he is kicking you in the seat of the pants.
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Joyce Carol Oates
If you explore beneath shyness or party chit-chat, you can sometimes turn a dull exchange into an intriguing one. I've found this to be particularly true in the case of professors or intellectuals, who are full of fascinating information, but need encouragement before they'll divulge it.
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Mark Twain
All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence; then success is sure.
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Ralph Ellison, "The Invisible Man"
I am an invisible man. No, I am not a spook like those who haunted Edgar Allan Poe; nor am I one of your Hollywood-movie ectoplasms. I am invisible, understand, simply because people refuse to see me.
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Catherine de Hueck Doherty, O Magazine, October 2002
Acquire inner peace and a multitude will find their salvation near you.
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Jack London
There is an ecstasy that marks the summit of life, and beyond which life cannot rise. And such is the paradox of living, this ecstasy comes when one is most alive, and it comes as a complete forgetfulness that one is alive.
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Maria Montessori
The teacher must derive not only the capacity, but the desire, to observe natural phenomena. The teacher must understand and feel her position of observer the activity must lie in the phenomenon.
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Edmund Burke, "A Philosophical Inquiry into the Origin of Our Ideas of the Sublime and Beautiful", 1756
No passion so effectually robs the mind of all its powers of acting and reasoning as fear.
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Louise Brown
If you can't return a favor, pass it on.
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Andrew A. Rooney
If dogs could talk, it would take a lot of the fun out of owning one.
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The Book of the Golden Precepts
The way to final freedom is within thy self.
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Bruce Lee, Tao of Jeet Kune Do
Do not run away; let go. Do not seek, for it will come when least expected.
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