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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Funniest Online Famous Quotations - 159
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Alexander Pope
It is with narrow-souled people as with narrow necked bottles the less they have in them, the more noise they make in pouring it out.
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Robert Louis Stevenson
Keep your fears to yourself, but share your inspiration with others.
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Bertrand Russell
Men fear thought as they fear nothing else on earth -- more than ruin -- more even than death.... Thought is subversive and revolutionary, destructive and terrible, thought is merciless to privilege, established institutions, and comfortable habit. Thought looks into the pit of hell and is not afraid. Thought is great and swift and free, the light of the world, and the chief glory of man.
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John Lennon
I remember a time when everybody I loved hated me because I hated them. - Letter to Stuart Sutcliffe circa 1960
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Jacqueline Lee Bouvier Kennedy Onassis
If you bungle raising your children, I don't think whatever else you do matters.
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Sir Francis Bacon, Of Adversity
Certainly virtue is like precious odours, most fragrant when they are incensed or crushed: for prosperity doth best discover vice; but adversity doth best discover virtue.
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Edith Hamilton
When the mind withdraws into itself and dispenses with facts it makes only chaos.
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Tennessee Williams
You can be young without money but you can't be old without it.
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Dante Alighieri, The Divine Comedy
There is no greater sorrow Than to be mindful of the happy time
In misery.
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Paul Adrien Maurice Dirac
In science one tries to tell people, in such a way as to be understood by everyone, something that no one ever knew before. But in poetry, it's the exact opposite.
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Kingman Brewster, Jr.
The function of a briefing paper is to prevent the ambassador from saying something dreadfully indiscreet. I sometimes think its true object is to prevent the ambassador from saying anything at all.
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Horace
Dum loquimur invida aetas fugerit. (While we talk, hostile time flies away)
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