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A random selection of fabulous funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.

Humorous Online Famous Quotations - 155

Thomas J. Watson

Follow the path of the unsafe, independent thinker. Expose your ideas to the dangers of controversy. Speak your mind and fear less the label of 'crackpot' than the stigma of conformity. And on issues that seem important to you, stand up and be counted at any cost.


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H. L. Mencken

The capacity of human beings to bore one another seems to be vastly greater than that of any other animals.


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Colin Turnbull, anthropologist, The Human Cycle

Civilization is very much an immature and ongoing experiment, the success of which is by no means yet proven.


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John Keats

What the imagination seizes as beauty must be the truth.


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Charlotte Bronte

I try to avoid looking forward or backward, and try to keep looking upward.


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God\'s Little Instruction Book

Sorrow looks back... Worry looks around... But, faith looks up.


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Michael Pritchard

No matter how rich you become, how famous or powerful, when you die the size of your funeral will still pretty much depend on the weather.


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Bruce Barcott

The thing that I still come back away with is how close so many people feel to the mountain Mt. Rainier emotionally and psychically, and yet how far away the world is when you're on the mountain.


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Ian Pattison, Rab C. Nesbitt, television series

I hate middle age. Too young for the bowling green, too old for Ecstasy.


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Henny Youngman

When God sneezed, I didn't know what to say.


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Marie Curie

Nothing in life is to be feared, it is only to be understood. Now is the time to understand more, so that we may fear less.


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Ocean\'s Eleven

Linus Apparently, he's got a record longer than my... well, it's long.



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