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A random selection of fabulous funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.

Humour Online Famous Quotations - 144

Ronnie Shakes

I like life. It's something to do.


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Korean Proverb

Where there are no tigers, a wildcat is very self-important.


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David L Boren

What makes the difference between a Nation that is truly great and one that is merely rich and powerful It is the simple things that make the difference. Honesty, knowing right from wrong, openness, self-respect, and the courage of conviction.


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Sarah Brady

We are not for disarming people. When you have an epidemic it's a public health issue, a safety issue.


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Joseph J. Lamb

The road to success leads through the valley of humility, and the path is up the ladder of patience and across the wide barren plains of perseverance. As yet, no short cut has ever been discovered.


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B. J. Gupta

All fingers are not alike, If you cut bigger ones to make all equal it is communism, If you stretch smaller ones to make all equal it is socialism, If you do nothing to make all equal it is capitalism.


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F Scott

Vitality shows in not only the ability to persist but the ability to start over.


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Augusta Jane Evans

Life does not count by years. Some suffer a lifetime in a day, and so grow old between the rising and the setting of the sun.


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Richard Bach, Illusions [1977]

You are never given a wish without also being given the power to make it come true. You may have to work for it, however.


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Titus Maccius Plautus

No man is wise enough by himself.


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Norman O. Brown

All currency is neurotic currency.


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P.T. Barnum

Money is a terrible master but an excellent servant.



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