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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Silly Online Famous Quotations - 112
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Fran Lebowitz
Nothing succeeds like address.
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Doris Day
The really frightening thing about middle age is that you know you'll grow out of it.
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Benjamin Franklin
If you know how to spend less than you get, you have the philosopher's stone.
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Jean de la Bruyere
We perceive when love begins and when it declines by our embarrassment when alone together.
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Agnes de Mille
The truest expression of a people is in its dance and music.
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Francis Bacon
For those who intend to discover and to understand, not to indulge in conjectures and soothsaying, and rather than contrive imitation and fabulous worlds plan to look deep into the nature of the real world and to dissect it -- for them everything must be sought in things themselves.
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Monica Baldwin
I have always felt that the moment when first you wake up in the morning is the most wonderful of the twenty-four hours.
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Sophie Tucker
From birth to age eighteen, a girl needs good parents. From eighteen to thirty-five, she needs good looks.
From thirty-five to fifty-five, she needs a good personality.
From fifty-five on, she needs good cash.
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Marshall McLuhan
The new electronic interdependence recreates the world in the image of a global village.
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Napoleon Bonaparte
Never awake me when you have good news to announce, because with good news nothing presses but when you have bad news, arouse me immediately, for then there is not an instant to be lost.
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Jean Houston
At the height of laughter, the universe is flung into a kaleidoscope of new possibilities.
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Walter Schirra, Sr.
You don't raise heroes, you raise sons. And if you treat them like sons, they'll turn out to be heroes, even if it's just in your own eyes.
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