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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Humorous Online Famous Quotations - 135
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Woody Allen
The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won't get much sleep.
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Georg Christoph Lichtenberg
With most men, unbelief in one thing springs from blind belief in another.
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Martin Luther
Anything that one imagines of God apart from Christ is only useless thinking and vain idolatry.
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George Bernard Shaw, "Ceasar and Cleopatra"
Pardon him, Theodotus: he is a barbarian, and thinks that the customs of his tribe and island are the laws of nature.
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Cato the Elder
Patience is the greatest of all virtues.
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John Stuart Mill
One person with a belief is equal to a force of 99 who have only interests.
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Napolean Hill
Cherish your visions and your dreams as they are the children of your soul the blue prints of your ultimate accomplishments.
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Ukranian Proverb
The church is near, but the way is icy, The tavern is far, but I will walk carefully.
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John Dryden
The gates of Hell are open night and day Smooth the descent, and easy is the way But, to return, and view the cheerful skies In this, the task and mighty labor lies.
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Vidal Sassoon
The only place where success comes before work is a dictionary.
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Alan Stewart Paton
What broke in a man when he could bring himself to kill another
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Wernher Magnus Maximilian von Braun
I believe in an immortal soul. Science has proved that nothing disintegrates into nothingness. Life and soul, therefore, cannot disintegrate into nothingness, and so are immortal.
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