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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Humorous Quotations from Famous People - 195
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Edmund Burke
Nobility is a graceful ornament to the civil order. It is the Corinthian capital of polished society.
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Sir Arthur Helps
Wise sayings often fall on barren ground; but a kind word is never thrown away.
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Unknown
Life has no rehearsals, only performances.
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Unknown
How to win a case in court: If the law is on your side, pound on the law; if the facts are on your side, pound on the facts; if neither is on your side, pound on the table.
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Francois de La Rochefoucauld
Why is it that our memory is good enough to retain the least triviality that happens to us, and yet not good enough to recollect how often we have told it to the same person?
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Plato
The direction in which education starts a man will determine his future life.
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Bishop Richard Cumberland
It is better to wear out than to rust out.
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Kurt Vonnegut, "Cold Turkey", In These Times, May 10, 2004
One of the few good things about modern times: If you die horribly on television, you will not have died in vain. You will have entertained us.
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Karl Barth
It is always the case that when the Christian looks back, he is looking at the forgiveness of sins.
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H. G. Wells
After people have repeated a phrase a great number of times, they begin to realize it has meaning and may even be true.
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Richard Feynman
We are at the very beginning of time for the human race. It is not unreasonable that we grapple with problems. But there are tens of thousands of years in the future. Our responsibility is to do what we can, learn what we can, improve the solutions, and pass them on.
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William Hazlitt
No really great man ever thought himself so.
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