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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Amusing Proverbs and Sayings - 127
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Don Snyder
Let us hope that we are all preceded in this world by a love story.
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Leo Durocher
Baseball is like church. Many attend, few understand.
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Ralph Waldo Emerson
I hate quotations. Tell me what you know.
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Jack Handey Deep Thoughts
If you wear a toupee, why not let your friends try it on for a while Come on, we're not going to hurt it.
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Lord Chesterfield
Know the true value of time; snatch, seize, and enjoy every moment of it. No idleness; no laziness; no procrastination; never put off till tomorrow what you can do today.
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E. B. White
I am often mad, but I would hate to be nothing but mad and I think I would lose what little value I may have as a writer if I were to refuse, as a matter of principle, to accept the warming rays of the sun, and to report them, whenever, and if ever, they happen to strike me.
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Doug Floyd
You don't get harmony when everybody sings the same note.
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David Viscott
To fail is a natural consequence of trying, To succeed takes time and prolonged effort in the face of unfriendly odds. To think it will be any other way, no matter what you do, is to invite yourself to be hurt and to limit your enthusiasm for trying again.
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Mahatma Gandhi
One needs to be slow to form convictions, but once formed they must be defended against the heaviest odds.
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Richard Baxter
In necessary things, unity; in doubtful things, liberty; in all things, charity.
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Thomas Jefferson
The sovereign invigorator of the body is exercise, and of all the exercises walking is the best.
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Nikita Khrushchev
Whether you like it or not, history is on our side. We will bury you.
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