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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Clever Proverbs and Sayings - 108
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Albert Einstein, on atomic energy, Jan. 22, 1947
We believe that an informed citizenry will act for life and not for death.
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Hunter S. Thompson, Generation of Swine
If there is, in fact, a Heaven and a Hell, all we know for sure is that Hell will be a viciously overcrowded version of Phoenix...
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Peter Ustinov
Comedy is simply a funny way of being serious.
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Chinese Proverb
If you bow at all, bow low.
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von Weizsacker
Nature is earlier than man, but man is earlier than natural science.
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Gary Thadani
Never, Never, Never Say NEVER
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Alice Walker
The most important question in the world is, 'Why is the child crying'
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Jack Handey Deep Thoughts
There should be a detective show called 'Johnny Monkey,' because every week you could have a guy say 'I ain't gonna get caught by no MONKEY,' but then he would, and I don't think I'd ever get tired of that.
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Lawrence Peter Berra
I never said most of the things I said.
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Don Marquis
When a man tells you that he got rich through hard work, ask him 'Whose
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Charles Dickens
I have known a vast quantity of nonsense talked about bad men not looking you in the face. Don't trust that conventional idea. Dishonesty will stare honestly out of countenance any day of the week, if there is anything to get got by it.
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Oliver Wendell Holmes Jr.
To live is to function. That is all there is in living.
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