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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Humour Proverbs and Sayings - 104
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Ken Thompson, quoted by Dennis Ritchie
Just think, IBM and DEC in the same room, and we did it.
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F Scott
The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in the mind at the same time, and still retain the ability to function. One should, for example, be able to see that things are hopeless and yet be determined to make them otherwise.
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Johnson
Knowledge always desires increase; it is like fire, which must first be kindled by some external agent, but which will afterward propagate it.
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George Santayana, Vol. 53 / No. 18 MMWR page 391
The wisest mind has something yet to learn.
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Malcolm Forbes
Too many people overvalue what they are, and undervalue what they are not.
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Robert Heinlein, Stranger in a Srange Land
Love is the condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.... Jealousy is a disease, love is a healthy condition. The immature mind often mistakes one for the other, or assumes that the greater the love the greater the jealousy.
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Robert E. Lee
Duty then is the sublimest word in the English language. You should do your duty in all things. You can never do more. You should never wish to do less.
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William Faulkner
Business is always interfering with pleasure, but it makes other pleasures possible.
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Karen Burka
A lot of advertisers lined up to throw money at this stuff because they were caught up in the hysteria about the Web. But now they want to know how you make money selling a 1.59 bottle of dish detergent on the World Wide Web.
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Anita Brookner
Real love is a pilgrimage. It happens when there is no strategy, but it is very rare because most people are strategists.
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Douglas Adams
Time is an illusion. Lunchtime doubly so.
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Ronnie Shakes
I was going to buy a copy of The Power of Positive Thinking, and then I thought: What the hell good would that do?
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