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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Funny Proverbs and Quotations - 41
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Eric Hoffer
The fear of becoming a 'has-been' keeps some people from becoming anything.
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Charles Simmons
Accurate knowledge is the basis of correct opinions; the want of it makes the opinions of most people of little value.
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Miguel de Cervantes
My heart is wax moulded as she pleases, but enduring as marble to retain.
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Bill Vaughan
We learn something every day, and lots of times it's that what we learned the day before was wrong.
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Ed McMahon
God invented whiskey to keep the Irish from ruling the world.
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Will Rogers
It's not what you pay a man, but what he costs you that counts.
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James Branch Cabell
The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds and the pessimist fears this is true.
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T. S. Eliot
We know too much, and are convinced of too little. Our literature is a substitute for religion, and so is our religion.
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Leo Rosten
I learned that it is the weak who are cruel, and that gentleness is to be expected only from the strong.
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Titus Livius
There is always more spirit in attack than in defence.
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M. Grundler
The best inheritance a parent can give to his children is a few minutes of their time each day.
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Francois de La Rochefoucauld
He who lives without folly isn't so wise as he thinks.
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