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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Crazy Proverbs and Sayings - 143
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G. K. Chesterton
There are no wise few. Every aristocracy that has ever existed has behaved, in all essential points, exactly like a small mob.
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Zig Ziglar
This I do know beyond any reasonable doubt. Regardless of what you are doing, if you pump long enough, hard enough and enthusiastically enough, sooner or later the effort will bring forth the reward.
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John Milton
Thou canst not touch the freedom of my mind.
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Bette Davis
There are new words now that excuse everybody. Give me the good old days of heroes and villains. the people you can bravo or hiss. There was a truth to them that all the slick credulity of today cannot touch.
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Hanna Arendt, 1906 - 1975
Under conditions of tyranny it is far easer to act than to think.
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Alfred North Whitehead
Seek simplicity, and distrust it.
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Theodore Roosevelt
Don't hit at all if it is honorably possible to avoid hitting but never hit soft
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Jorge Luis Borges
To fall in love is to create a religion that has a fallible god.
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Sybil Adelman
In Kyudo philosophy, you don't aim--you become one with the target. Then, in fact, there's nothing to aim at. I find it works well with women, too. Give it a try.
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Richard Kehl
A little boy came home and told his mother he had gotten first prize in an examination. The question had been How many legs does a horse have He had answered, Three. When his mother asked how he had gotten the first prize, he replied that all the other children had said, Two.
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Irv Kupcinet
What can you say about a society that says that God is dead and Elvis is alive
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Jeff Melvoin
What is it about possessing things Why do we feel the need to own what we love, and why do we become jerks when we do We've all been there-- you want something, to possess it. By possessing something you lose it. You finally win the girl of your dreams, the first thing you do is change her. The little things she does with her hair, the way she wears her clothes or the way she chews her gum. Pretty soon what you like, what you changed, what you don't like, blends together like a watercolor in the rain.
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