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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Humorous Proverbs and Quotations - 55
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Saint Jerome
Never look a gift horse in the mouth.
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Michel de Montaigne
Fashion is the science of appearances, and it inspires one with the desire to seem rather than to be.
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Arabic Proverb
All sunshine makes a desert.
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Benjamin Franklin
He that has done you a kindness will be more ready to do you another, than he whom you yourself have obliged.
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Stephen Butler Leacock
Have you ever been out for a late autumn walk in the closing part of the afternoon, and suddenly looked up to realize that the leaves have practically all gone And the sun has set and the day gone before you knew it - and with that a cold wind blows across the landscape That's retirement.
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Trey and Matt Stone Parker
You know, I think that if parents would spend less time worrying about what their kids watch on TV and more time worrying about what's going on in their kids' lives, this world would be a much better place.
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Kahlil Gibran
Life without love is like a tree without blossoms or fruit.
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Abraham Lincoln
I am not concerned that you have fallen; I am concerned that you arise.
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Oscar Wilde
The problem with the common person is that he is so unbearably common!
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Oscar Wilde
Consistency is the last resort of the unimaginative.
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Robert A. Heinlein, The Moon is a Harsh Mistress
The power to tax, once conceded, has no limits; it contains until it destroys.
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Mitchell Burgess
Cranes carry this heavy mystical baggage. They're icons of fidelity and happiness. The Vietnamese believe cranes cart our souls up to heaven on our wings.
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