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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Funniest Sayings Proverbs and Quotations - 59
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E. M. Forster
But the body is deeper than the soul and its secrets inscrutable.
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Rush Limbaugh
Compassion is no substitute for justice.
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Lord Acton
It is bad to be oppressed by a minority, but it is worse to be oppressed by a majority. For there is a reserve of latent power in the masses which, if it is called into play, the minority can seldom resist. But from the absolute will of an entire people there is no appeal, no redemption, no refuge but treason.
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William Penn
Truth often suffers more by the heat of its defenders, than from the arguments of its opposers.
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Galileo Galilei
Mathematics is the language with which God has written the universe.
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Thomas Jefferson
He is happiest of whom the world says least, good or bad.
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Ralph Waldo Emerson
A weed is just a plant whose virtues have not yet been discovered.
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Author Unknown
Desire for security keeps littleness little and threatens the great with smallness.
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Harold Geneen
Performance is your reality. Forget everything else.
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Charlie Manuel
There's no pressure in baseball. Pressure is when the doctor is getting ready to cut you, take your heart out, and put it on a table.
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Jules Renard
Love is like an hourglass, with the heart filling up as the brain empties.
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Lillian
Sometimes when I look at all my children, I say to myself, Lillian, you should have stayed a virgin.
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