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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Humour Sayings Proverbs and Quotations - 84
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Robert Killinger
You can't win at everything, but you can laugh at everything.
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Woody Allen
As the poet said, 'Only God can make a tree' -- probably because it's so hard to figure out how to get the bark on.
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Pierre Corneille
Love lives on hope, and dies when hope is dead
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Terry Goodkind, "Blood of the Fold"
But if used for retribution, magic is vengeance incarnate.
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Donatien-Alphonse-Francois de Sade
A poor fool indeed is he who adopts a manner of thinking (meant) for others!
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Sir J.C. Squire, Ballade of Soporific Absorption
But I’m not so think as you drunk I am.
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The Dhammapada
Do not speak harshly to any one those who are spoken to will answer thee in the same way. Angry speech is painful blows for blows will touch thee.
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John Lahr
Accustomed to the veneer of noise, to the shibboleths of promotion, public relations, and market research, society is suspicious of those who value silence.
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Arthur C. Clarke
Sometimes I think we're alone in the universe, and sometimes I think we're not. In either case, the idea is quite staggering.
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Confucius
Ignorance is the night of the mind, but a night without moon and star.
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Sir Francis Bacon
Money is like muck, not good except it be spread.
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Vince Lombardi
The Green Bay Packers never lost a football game. They just ran out of time.
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