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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Funny Random Quotes and Sayings - 151
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Gore Vidal
For certain people after 50, litigation takes the place of sex.
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Bertrand Russell
There is no nonsense so errant that it cannot be made the creed of the vast majority by adequate governmental action.
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Albert Einstein
He who joyfully marches to music rank and file, has already earned my contempt. He has been given a large brain by mistake, since for him the spinal cord would surely suffice. This disgrace to civilization should be done away with at once. Heroism at command, how violently I hate all this, how despicable and ignoble war is; I would rather be torn to shreds than be a part of so base an action. It is my conviction that killing under the cloak of war is nothing but an act of murder.
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Bible, Proverbs 26:4 (NIV)
Answer a fool according to his folly, or he will be wise in his own eyes.
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Kin Hubbard
The safest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it in your pocket.
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Francois de La Rochefoucauld
Before we set our hearts too much upon anything, let us examine how happy those are who already possess it.
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Mahatma Gandhi
There is more to life than increasing its speed
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W. B. Yeats
Education is not the filling of a pail, but the lighting of a fire.
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Sir William Bragg
God runs electromagnetics by wave theory on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, and the Devil runs them by quantum theory on Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday.
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Christiane, M.D. Northrup
Feeling grateful to or appreciative of someone or something in your life actually attracts more of the things that you appreciate and value into your life.
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Michel Eyquem de Montaigne
God gives us our relatives- thank God we can choose our friends.
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Eric Pio
You are not an artist,an artist creates. You do not write your own songs. End of debate.
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