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A random selection of fabulous funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.

Clever Random Quotes and Sayings - 118

Brian Tracy

Successful people are always looking for opportunities to help others. Unsuccessful people are always asking, What's in it for me


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Trey and Matt Stone Parker

Family isn't about whose blood you have. It's about who you care about.


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Ben Shahn

I believe that if it were left to artists to choose their own labels, most would choose none.


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Brenda Ueland

Since you are like no other being ever created since the beginning of time, you are incomparable.


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Laurence J. Peter

You can always tell a real friend when you've made a fool of yourself he doesn't feel you've done a permanent job.


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Ralph Waldo Emerson

A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds, adored by little statesmen and philosophers and divines. With consistency a great soul has simply nothing to do.


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Saint Thomas Aquinas

Beware the man of one book.


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Theodore Roosevelt, The Man in the Arena

Far better is to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checkered by failure, than to take rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy much nor suffer much, because they live in the grey twilight that knows not victory nor defeat.


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Aristotle

Men acquire a particular quality by constantly acting a particular way...you become just by performing just actions, temperate by performing temperate actions, brave by performing brave actions.


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Calvin Coolidge

There is no right to strike against the public safety by anybody, anywhere, any time.


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Voltaire

There is a wide difference between speaking to deceive, and being silent to be impenetrable.


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Samuel Johnson

ESSAY -- A loose sally of the mind an irregular indigested piece not a regular and orderly composition.



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