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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Silly Random Quotes and Sayings - 102
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Dr. Laura Schlessinger
Situations reveal who we are, they don't create who we are.
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Robert Brault
Today I bent the truth to be kind, and I have no regret, for I am far surer of what is kind than I am of what is true.
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Carrie
There is no point at which you can say, 'Well, I'm successful now. I might as well take a nap.
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Joseph Sobran
The attempt to silence a man is the greatest honor you can bestow on him. It means that you recognize his superiority to yourself.
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Rig Veda
Let the stronger man give to the man whose need is greater let him gaze upon the lengthening path of life. For riches roll like the wheels of a chariot, turning from one to another.
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Rudyard Kipling
The female of the species is more deadly than the male.
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Robin Leach
When I interview people, and they give me an immediate answer, they're often not thinking. So I'm silent. I wait. Because they think they have to keep answering. And it's the second train of thought that's the better answer.
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John M. Eades
There are some days I practice positive thinking, and other days I'm not positive I am thinking.
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Robert Wibbelsman
The problem with the person who thinks he's a long-term investor and impervious to short-term gyrations is that the emotion of fear and pain will eventually make him sell badly.
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George Bernard Shaw
Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh.
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George Orwell
We sleep safe in our beds because rough men stand ready in the night to visit violence on those who would do us harm.
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Benjamin Franklin
A life of leisure and a life of laziness are two different things.
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