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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Sarcastic Random Quotes and Sayings - 146
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John P. Loughrane
It is a sign of strength, not of weakness, to admit that you don't know all the answers.
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Kahlil Gibran
The eye of a human being is a microscope, which makes the world seem bigger than it really is.
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Marcus Tullius Cicero
To be ignorant of what happened before you were born is to be ever a child. For what is man's lifetime unless the memory of past events is woven with those of earlier times
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Henry Ford
Before everything else, getting ready is the secret of success.
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Confucius
Without knowing the force of words, it is impossible to know men.
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Robert Anton Wilson
Only the madman is absolutely sure.
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David Letterman
Everyone has a purpose in life. Perhaps yours is watching television.
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Jeremy Collier
Everyone has a fair turn to be as great as he pleases.
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Robin Williams
See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time.
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Al Capone
This American system of ours . . . call it Americanism, call it capitalism, call it what you like, gives to each and every one of us a great opportunity if we only seize it with both hands and make the most of it.
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Marie De France, 12th Century
A bully is not reasonable - he is persuaded only by threats.
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William Safire
Knowing how things work is the basis for appreciation, and is thus a source of civilized delight.
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