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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Very Funny Random Quotes and Sayings - 100
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John Maynard Keynes
The avoidance of taxes is the only intellectual pursuit that still carries any reward.
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Charles Caleb Colton
Riches may enable us to confer favours, but to confer them with propriety and grace requires a something that riches cannot give.
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Ralph Waldo Emerson
We become what we think about all day long.
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Michael R. Baer
Perhaps each life has one sensational thought, if acted upon will bring great meaning.
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Søren Kierkegaard, Journal 1848
Of all tyrannies democracy is the most agonizing, the most inane, the absolute fall of everything great and elevated.
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Jane Austen, Mansfield Park
In all the important preparations of the mind she was complete: being prepared for matrimony by an hatred of home, restraint, and tranquillity; by the misery of disappointed affection, and contempt of the man she was to marry.
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Francois Marie Arouet Voltaire
Anything that is too stupid to be spoken is sung.
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Roscoe Pound
The law must be stable, but it must not stand still.
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Mae West
I'm very brave generally,' he went on in a low voice 'Only today I happen to have a headache.'
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Alan Stewart Paton
To give up the task of reforming society is to give up one's responsibility as a free man.
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Spider-Man
Peter Who am I You sure you want to know The story of my life is not for the faint of heart. If somebody said it was a happy little tale... if somebody told you I was just your average ordinary guy, not a care in the world... somebody lied.
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Sophocles, Ajax
It is not righteousness to outrage A brave man dead, not even though you hate him.
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