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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Very Funny Random Quotes and Sayings - 150
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Mark Twain
Principles have no real force except when one is well-fed.
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Smiley Blanton
The desire for success lubricates secret prostitutions in the soul.
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Eric Gibson, in The Wall Street Journal
Anonymity is the truest expression of altruism.
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Evenius
The crowd gives the leader new strength.
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John Barrymore
Method acting? There are quite a few methods. Mine involves a lot of talent, a glass and some cracked ice.
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Arnold Bennett
The great advantage of being in a rut is that when one is in a rut, one knows exactly where one is.
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Roger Rosenblatt
Children love to be alone because alone is where they know themselves, and where they dream.
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Jewish Proverb
Worries go down better with soup than without.
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Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
The lowest ebb is the turn of the tide.
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Mary McLeod Bethune
The drums of Africa still beat in my heart. They will not let me rest while there is a single Negro boy or girl without a chance to prove his worth.
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Horace
Pale Death with impartial tread beats at the poor man's cottage door and at the palaces of kings.
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Chinese Proverb
The gem cannot be polished without friction, nor man perfected without trials.
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