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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Sarcastic Random Funny Quotes - 116
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Gloria Shayne
Goodbye cruel world.
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Henry Ward Beecher
I never knew an early-rising, hard-working, prudent man, careful of his earnings, and strictly honest who complained of bad luck.
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Kin Hubbard
Nothing is as irritating as the fellow who chats pleasantly while he's overcharging you.
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Benjamin Franklin
All would live long, but none would be old.
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John C. Dvorak
In all large corporations, there is a pervasive fear that someone, somewhere is having fun with a computer on company time. Networks help alleviate that fear.
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Jean-Paul Sartre
One is still what one is going to cease to be and already what one is going to become. One lives one's death, one dies one's life.
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Angel Blessing
There are questions of real power and then there are questions of phony authority. You have to break through the phony authority to begin to fight the real questions of power.
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Peter Marshall
Small deeds done are better than great deeds planned.
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German proverb
The eyes believe themselves the ears believe other people.
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Thomas Hood (1799-1845), in the poem called No!
No sun - no moon! No morn - no noon - No dawn - no dusk - no proper time of day.
No warmth, no cheerfulness, no healthful ease,
No comfortable feel in any member -
No shade, no shine, no butterflies, no bees,
No fruits, no flowers, no leaves, no birds,
November!
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Anon.
Earth is 98 full. Please delete anyone you can.
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Richard Milhous Nixon
Under the doctrine of separation of powers, the manner in which the president personally exercises his assigned executive powers is not subject to questioning by another branch of government.
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