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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Clever Random Funny Quotes - 28
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Author Unknown
No punishment of the unrighteous has ever been too severe in the eyes of the righteous.
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Helena Rubinstein
I have always felt that a woman has the right to treat the subject of her age with ambiguity until, perhaps, she passes into the realm of over ninety. Then it is better she be candid with herself and with the world.
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William John Bennett
If my own son, who is now 10 months, came to me and said, 'You promised to pay for my tuition at Harvard how about giving me '50
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Lucius Annaeus Seneca
If wisdom were offered me with this restriction, that I should keep it close and not communicate it, I would refuse the gift.
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Ralph Waldo Emerson
People wish to be settled. It is only as far as they are unsettled that there is any hope for them.
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William Congreve
He that first cries out stop thief, is often he that has stolen the treasure.
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Benjamin Haydon
Men who have reached and passed forty-five, have a look as if waiting for the secret of the other world, and as if they were perfectly sure of having found out the secret of this.
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Paul Gauguin
I shut my eyes in order to see.
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William Shakespeare
Glory is like a circle in the water, Which never ceaseth to enlarge itself, Till by broad spreading it disperses to naught.
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Marcus Tullius Cicero
Not to know the events which happened before one was born, that is to remain always a boy.
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Washington Irving
A kind heart is a fountain of gladness, making everything in its vicinity freshen into smiles.
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Proverbs 2918 Bible
Where there is no vision, the people perish.
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