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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Sarcastic Random Funny Quotes - 26
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Clarence Darrow
You can only protect your liberties in this world by protecting the other man's freedom. You can only be free if I am free.
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Robert Frost
Happiness makes up in height for what it lacks in length.
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Roger Smith
You don't just stumble into the future. You create your own future.
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Mark Twain, inscription beneath his bust in the Hall of Fame
Loyalty to petrified opinion never yet broke a chain or freed a human soul.
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John Herschel
Self-respect is the cornerstone of all virtue.
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Claudia Alta Taylor Johnson
This is something that I cherish. Once in a friend's home I came across this blessing, and took it down in shorthand ... it says something I like to live with Oh Thou, who dwellest in so many homes, possess Thyself of this. Bless the life that is sheltered here. Grant that trust and peace and comfort abide within, and that love and life and usefulness may go out from this home forever.
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Jim Morrison, Biography
Drugs are a bet with your mind.
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James Earl Jones
When I read great literature, great drama, speeches, or sermons, I feel that the human mind has not achieved anything greater than the ability to share feelings and thoughts through language.
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Steve Kravitz
Ford used to have a better idea now they don't have a clue.
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Laertius Diogenes
Democritus says, But we know nothing really for truth lies deep down.
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Peter McWilliams
Mistakes, obviously, show us what needs improving. Without mistakes, how would we know what we had to work on
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Henry Drummond
You will find as you look back upon your life that the moments when you have truly lived are the moments when you have done things in the spirit of love.
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