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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Amusing Random Funny Quotes - 77
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Jackie Mason
It's no longer a question of staying healthy. It's a question of finding a sickness you like.
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Jessamyn West
People who keep journals have life twice.
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Peter Stack, in a movie review in the San Francisco Chronicle, Jan 2, 1983
My tears stuck in their little ducts, refusing to be jerked.
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George Santayana, Soliloquies in England, 1922, "War Shrines"
There is no cure for birth and death save to enjoy the interval.
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William Occam
Entia non sunt multiplicanda praeter necessitatem (Entities must not be multiplied beyond necessity.)
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Bertrand Russell
If fifty million people say a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing.
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Alfred A. Knopf
An economist is a man who states the obvious in terms of the incomprehensible.
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H. L. Mencken
Love: The delusion that one woman differs from another.
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Miyamoto Musashi, "A Book of Five Rings"
Perception is strong, sight is weak.
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Joseph Addison
What sunshine is to flowers, smiles are to humanity. These are but trifles, to be sure but scattered along life's pathway, the good they do is inconceivable.
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Mahatma Gandhi
Among the many misdeeds of the British rule in India, history will look upon the act of depriving a whole nation of arms as the blackest.
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Henry Van Dyke
Be glad of life because it gives you the chance to love, and to work, and to play, and to look up at the stars and sun.
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