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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Humour Random Funny Quotes - 84
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Edna Ferber
Living in the past is a dull and lonely business looking back strains the neck muscles, causes you to bump into people not going your way.
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Bertolt Brecht
What happens to the hole when the cheese is gone?
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Bob Dylan, "If you see her, say hello"
Sundown, yellow moon, I replay the past. I know every scene by heart, they all went by so fast.
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W. E. Gladstone
No man ever became great or good except through many and great mistakes.
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Marcus Aelius Aurelius
A good man does not spy around for the black spots in others, but presses unswervingly on towards his mark.
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Victor Kiam
What's really important in life Sitting on a beach Looking a television eight hours a day I think we have to appreciate that we're alive for only a limited period of time, and we'll spend most of our lives working. That being the case, I believe one of the most important priorities is to do whatever we do as well as we can. We should take pride in that.
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Richard Milhous Nixon
The greatness comes not when things go always good for you. But the greatness comes when you're really tested, when you take some knocks, some disappointments, when sadness comes. Because only if you've been in the deepest valley can you ever know how magnificent it is to be on the highest mountain.
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Russell G. Alexander
Life is not advancement. It is growth. It does not move upward, but expands outward, in all directions.
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Seneca
It is a great thing to know the season for speech and the season for silence.
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Henry Louis Mencken
It is inaccurate to say I hate everything. I am strongly in favor of common sense, common honesty, and common decency. This makes me forever ineligible for any public office.
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George Bernard Shaw
Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh.
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Black Elk
He was so narrow-minded he could see through a keyhole with two eyes.
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