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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Funny Random Quotes - 61
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Crow, The
Eric Draven Suddenly their came a tapping, as of someone gently rapping, rapping at my chamber door. You heard me rapping, right
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Sir Winston Churchill
For my part, I consider that it will be found much better by all parties to leave the past to history, especially as I propose to write that history myself.
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Pamela Ribon, Why Girls Are Weird, 2003
Having a holiday weekend without a family member felt like putting on a sweater that had an extra arm.
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Juvenal
Refrain from doing ill; for one all powerful reason, lest our children should copy our misdeeds; we are all too prone to imitate whatever is base and depraved.
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Susan Ertz
He talked with more claret than clarity.
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Nikita Khrushchev
Politicians are the same all over. They promise to build a bridge even where there is no river.
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Saint Thomas More, upon being executed
Friend, be not afraid of thy office, thou sendest me to God.
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H. Jackson Brown Jr.
Find a job you like and you add five days to every week.
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Charles Du Bos
The important thing is this: to be able at any moment to sacrifice what we are for what we could become.
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Marguerite de Valois
Tears may be dried up, but the heart - never.
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Jack Handey Deep Thoughts
If you're in a boxing match, try not to let the other guy's glove touch your lips, because you don't know where that glove has been.
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Virginia
The beauty of the world has two edges, one of laughter, one of anguish, cutting the heart asunder.
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