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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Humorous Random Quotes - 15
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Robert Benchley
It took me fifteen years to discover that I had no talent for writing, but I couldn't give it up because by that time I was too famous.
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Calvin Coolidge
It takes a great man to be a good listener.
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Blaise Pascal
It is not good to be too free. It is not good to have everything one wants.
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Mark Twain
We should be careful to get out of an experience only the wisdom that is in it - and stop there lest we be like the cat that sits down on a hot stove-lid. She will never sit down on a hot stove-lid again - and that is well but also she will never sit down on a cold one anymore.
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John Locke
The dread of evil is a much more forcible principle of human actions than the prospect of good.
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Sir Richard Francis Burton
Broke is a temporary condition, poor is a state of mind.
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Belgian Proverb
Experience is the comb that nature gives us when we are bald.
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George Burns
I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty.
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Kahlil Gibran
The timeless in you is aware of life's timelessness and knows that yesterday is but today's memory and tomorrow is today's dream.
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Marya Mannes
The sign of an intelligent people is their ability to control emotions by the application of reason.
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Joshua 19 Bible
Be strong and of good courage be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed for the Lord thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest.
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Andy Warhol
Two people kissing always look like fish.
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