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A random selection of fabulous funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.

Humour Random Quotes - 24

Daniel Webster

The world is governed more by appearances than realities, so that it is fully as necessary to seem to know something as to know it.


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Protagoras

There are two sides to every question.


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Stephen Covey

We are not human beings on a spiritual journey. We are spiritual beings on a human journey.


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John Donne

No man is an Island, entire of itself every man is a piece of the Continent, a part of the main if a clod be washed away by the sea, Europe is the less, as well as if a promontory were, as well as if a manor of thy friends or of thine own were any man's death diminishes me, because I am involved in Mankind And therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls It tolls for thee.


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Samuel Butler, The Note-Books of Samuel Butler (1912)

An apology for the devil: it must be remembered that we have heard only one side of the case; God has written all the books.


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Lois McMaster Bujold

I take it as a man's duty to restrain himself.


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Woody Allen, Annie Hall

I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy next to me.


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Gore Vidal

Whenever a friend succeeds a little something in me dies.


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Peter Borden

Most advances in science come when a person for one reason or another is forced to change fields.


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Richard Buckminster Fuller

There is nothing in a caterpillar that tells you it's going to be a butterfly.


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Sir Francis Bacon, Of Goodness, and Goodness of Nature (1625)

In charity there is no excess.


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Johann von Goethe

Everybody wants to be somebody nobody wants to grow.



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