Jack Handey Deep Thoughts

If I ever opened a trampoline store, I don't think I'd call it Trampo-Land, because you might think it was a store for tramps, which is not the impression we are trying to convey with our store. On the other hand, we would not prohibit tramps from browsing, or testing the trampolines, unless a tramp's gyrations seemed to be getting out of control.

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Bertrand Russell

In all affairs it's a healthy thing now and then to hang a question mark on the things you have long taken for granted.

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Janet Erskine Stuart

There ought to be so many who are excellent, there are so few.

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Henry David Thoreau

What a man thinks of himself that is what determines, or rather indicates his fate.

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Confucius

He who speaks without modesty will find it difficult to make his words good.

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Storm Jameson

Happiness comes of the capacity to feel deeply, to enjoy simply, to think freely, to risk life, to be needed.

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Oscar Wilde

I was working on the proof of one of my poems all the morning, and took out a comma. In the afternoon I put it back again.

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Homer

Zeus does not bring all men's plans to fulfillment.

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Chinese Proverb

When you want to test the depths of a stream, don't use both feet.

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Oliver Wendell Holmes Jr.

To be 70 years young is sometimes far more cheerful and hopeful than to be 40 years old.

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Homer, The Iliad

It was built against the will of the immortal gods, and so it did not last for long.

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Ellen Glasgow

I agree with every word you write, and I can prove this in no better way than by taking your advice from beginning to end.

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