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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Humorous Random Quotes - 175
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Martin Luther King, Jr.
I have a dream that one day ... the sons of former slave owners will be able to sit down together at the table of brotherhood.
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John Fitzgerald Kennedy
To state the facts frankly is not to despair the future nor indict the past. The prudent heir takes careful inventory of his legacies and gives a faithful accounting to those whom he owes an obligation of trust.
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Henry Fielding, The History of Tom Jones, a Foundling
Jenny replied to this with a bitterness which might have surprized a judicious person, who had observed the tranquillity with which she bore all the affronts to her chastity; but her patience was perhaps tired out, for this is a virtue which is very apt to be fatigued by exercise.
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Seneca
There is no great genius without some touch of madness.
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Mark Twain
There are people who strictly deprive themselves of each and every eatable, drinkable, and smokable which has in any way acquired a shady reputation. They pay this price for health. And health is all they get for it. How strange it is. It is like paying out your whole fortune for a cow that has gone dry.
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Neil Postman
I believe I am not mistaken in saying that Christianity is a demanding and serious religion. When it is delivered as easy and amusing, it is another kind of religion altogether.
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Unknown
You're the one I love to love, hate to hate, love to hate and hate to love.
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Frank Herbert, Dune
Absolute power is the power to destroy.
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Erica Jong
Everyone has talent. What is rare is the courage to follow talent to the dark place where it leads.
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Shirley Temple Black
I stopped believing in Santa Claus at age six when my mother took me to see him in a store and he asked for my autograph.
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Jeremy Taylor
It is impossible to make people understand their ignorance for it requires knowledge to perceive it and therefore he that can perceive it hath it not.
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Clifton Paul Fadiman
I think we must quote whenever we feel that the allusion is interesting or helpful or amusing.
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