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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Very Funny Random Quotations - 70
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Margaret Hilda Thatcher
Being powerful is like being a lady. If you have to tell people you are, you aren't.
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Kahlil Gibran, The Prophet
That which seems most feeble and bewildered in you is the strongest and most determined.
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Bruce Barton
Nothing splendid has ever been achieved except by those who dared believe that something inside of them was superior to circumstance.
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Chinese Proverb
The man who strikes first admits that his ideas have given out.
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Abbie M. Dale
To decide, to be at the level of choice, is to take responsibility for your life and to be in control of your life.
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Eric Pio
If you don't make your dreams a reality, reality will take away your dreams.
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Martin Niemoeller
First they came for the Communists but I was not a Communist so I did not speak out. Then they came for the Socialists and the Trade Unionists but I was not one of them, so I did not speak out. Then they came for the Jews but I was not Jewish so I did not speak out. And when they came for me, there was no one left to speak out for me.
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Japanese Proverb
If you believe everything you read, better not read.
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Bernard Berenson
Consistency requires you to be as ignorant today as you were a year ago.
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George Bernard Shaw
England and America are two countries separated by a common language.
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Bill Cosby, Playboy Interview - May 1969
I really do plan to get out of show business within five years or so.
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Rev. Randall R. McBride, Jr.
Success will not lower its standard to us. We must raise our standard to success.
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