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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Humour Random Quotations - 44
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John F. Kennedy
We need men who can dream of things that never were.
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Benjamin Franklin
Marry your son when you will, but you daughter when you can.
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Clifton Fadiman
Cheese - milk's leap toward immortality.
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Lord Byron
But words are things; and a small drop of ink, Falling, like dew, upon a thought, produces That which makes thousands, perhaps millions, think.
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Josef Stalin
Sincere diplomacy is no more possible than dry water or wooden iron.
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Samuel Adams
Comtemplate the mangled bodies of your countrymen and then ask yourself, What should be the reward of such sacrifices... If ye love wealth better than freedom, the tranquility of servitude than the animating contest of freedom, go from us in peace. We ask not your counsels or arms. Crouch down and lick the hands that feed you. May your chains sit lightly upon you, and may posterity forget that ye were our countrymen.
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Clement Richard Atlee, British prime minister (1945-1951)
Democracy means government by discussion, but it is only effective if you can stop people talking.
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Shannon Lucid
You think America is the biggest place on Earth, but it's not. The view from Mir put everything in perspective.
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Homer
Nothing feebler than a man does the earth raise up, of all the things which breathe and move on the earth, for he believes that he will never suffer evil in the future, as long as the gods give him success and he flourishes in his strength but when the blessed gods bring sorrows too to pass, even these he bears, against his will, with steadfast spirit, for the thoughts of earthly men are like the day which the father of gods and men brings upon them.
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Mahatma Gandhi
When I despair, I remember that all through history the ways of truth and love have always won. There have been tyrants, and murderers, and for a time they can seem invincible, but in the end they always fall. Think of it – always.
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William S. Burroughs
Every man has inside himself a parasitic being who is acting not at all to his advantage.
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Muriel Spark
No mind should submit their mind to another mind He that complies against his will is of his own opinion still -- that's my motto. I won't be brainwashed.
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