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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Silly Random Quotations - 42
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Confucius, Roots of Wisdom 4th edition
Humankind differs from the animals only by a little, and most people throw that away.
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Ashley Montague
The Good Book - one of the most remarkable euphemisms ever coined.
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R. H. Grant
When you hire people that are smarter than you are, you prove you are smarter than they are.
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Henry Louis Mencken
Bachelors know more about women than married men if they didn't they'd be married too.
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Robert Ingersoll
There are in nature neither rewards nor punishments, there are consequences.
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Jonathan Swift
We have enough religion to hate each other, but not enough to love each other.
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Edward Hagerup Grieg
When we are young, friends are, like everything else, a matter of course. In the old days we know what it means to have them.
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Sophocles
I have nothing but contempt for the kind of governor who is afraid, for whatever reason, to follow the course that he knows is best for the State and as for the man who sets private friendship above the public welfare - I have no use for him either.
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Henry David Thoreau
You must live in the present, launch yourself on every wave, find your eternity in each moment. Fools stand on their island opportunities and look toward another land. There is no other land, this is no other life but this.
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Cervantes, The Impossible Dream
One man scorned and covered with scars still strove with his last ounce of courage to reach the unreachable stars; and the world will be better for this.
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Patrick Henry
It is natural for a man to indulge in the illusions of hope. We are apt to shut out eyes against a painful truth and listen to the song of that siren, till she transforms into beasts.
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Oscar Levant
I am no more humble than my talents require.
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