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A random selection of fabulous funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.

Funniest Random Quotations - 69

Ralph Waldo Emerson

To the poet, to the philosopher, to the saint, all things are friendly and sacred, all events profitable, all days holy, all men divine.


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Titus Livius

Greater is our terror of the unknown.


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Japanese Proverb

One kind word can warm three winter months.


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Pearl Buck

Every great mistake has a halfway moment, a split second when it can be recalled and perhaps remedied.


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Publilius Syrus

Debt is the slavery of the free.


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Fran Lebowitz

The opposite of talking isn't listening. The opposite of talking is waiting.


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Arnold Bennett

The real tradegy is the tragedy of the man who never in his life braces himself for his one supreme effort-he never stretches to his full capacity, never stands up to his full stature.


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Abbie Hoffman, In response to the success of his book; Steal this Book

Its embarrassing, you try to overthrow the government and you wind up on a Best Sellers List.


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Norman Podhoretz

Creativity represents a miraculous coming together of the uninhibited energy of the child with its apparent opposite and enemy, the sense of order imposed on the disciplined adult intelligence.


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Beverly Sills

You may be disappointed if you fail, but you are doomed if you don't try.


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Ezra Loomis Pound

The curse of me & my nation is that we always think things can be bettered by immediate action of some sort, any sort rather than no sort.


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James L. Hayes

Jingshen is the Mandarin word for spirit and vivacity. It is an important word for those who would lead, because above all things, spirit and vivacity set effective organizations apart from those that will decline and die.



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