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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Clever Quotations from Famous People - 158
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Geronimo
I was born on the prairies where the wind blew free and there was nothing to break the light of the sun. I was born where there were no enclosures...
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Stephen Neill
The bad teacher imposes his ideas and his methods on his pupils, and such originality as they may have is lost in the second-rate art of imitation.
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Howard Tayler, Rule 12: Seven Habits of Highly Effective Pirates, Schlock Mercenary
A soft answer turneth away wrath. Once wrath is looking the other way, shoot it in the head.
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Rose Fitzgerald Kennedy
I looked on child rearing not only as a work of love and duty but as a profession that was fully as interesting and challenging as any honorable profession in the world and one that demanded the best that I could bring to it.
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Isaac Asimov
The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds new discoveries, is not 'Eureka' (I found it) but 'That's funny ...'
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Anon.
A real leader faces the music, even when he doesn't like the tune.
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Calvin Coolidge
Never go out to meet trouble. If you will just sit still, nine cases out of ten someone will intercept it before it reaches you.
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Matthew 821-22
And another of his disciples said unto him, Lord, suffer me first to go and bury my father. But Jesus said unto him, Follow me and let the dead bury their dead.
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Anonymous
Alas my love you do me wrong, To cast me of discurteously And I have loved you so long, Delighting in your company.
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Franklin P. Adams
You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have, for instance.
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George Carlin
Keep thy religion to thyself.
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Earl Warren
I'm very pleased with each advancing year. It stems back to when I was forty. I was a bit upset about reaching that milestone, but an older friend consoled me. 'Don't complain about growing old - many, many people do not have that privilege.'
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