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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Very Funny Quotations from Famous People - 160
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Robert Cecil
A wise man looks upon men as he does on horses; all their comparisons of title, wealth, and place, he consider but as harness.
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Alfred Victor Vigny
Above all, we must abolish hope in the heart of man. A calm despair, without angry convulsions, without reproaches to Heaven, is the essence of wisdom.
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A. J. Muste
There is no way to peace peace is the way.
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Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
When an idea is wanting, a word can always be found to take its place.
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William Blake
To see a world in a grain of sand and a heaven in a wildflower, hold infinity in the palm of your hand and eternity in an hour.
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Helen Hayes
When Charles first saw our child Mary, he said all the proper things for a new father. He looked upon the poor little red thing and blurted, She's more beautiful than the Brooklyn Bridge.
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Wystan Hugh Auden
Anyone who has a child today should train him to be either a physicist or a ballet dancer. Then he'll escape.
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Jack Handey Deep Thoughts
I hope that someday we will be able to put away our fears and prejudices and just laugh at people.
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Chuang-tzu, On Tolerance
Cherish that which is within you, and shut off that which is without.
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Thomas Jefferson
How much pain have cost us the evils which have never happened.
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Wendy Northcutt, Darwin Awards - literature
If at first you dont succeed, skydiving is not for you.
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Charles Fox
Pleasure and love are the pinions of great deeds.
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