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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Sarcastic Quotations from Famous People - 156
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Fran Lebowitz
I figure you have the same chance of winning the lottery whether you play or not.
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Chinese Proverb
When eating bamboo sprouts, remember the man who planted them.
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Lee Segall
It is possible to own too much. A man with one watch knows what time it is a man with two watches is never quite sure.
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Epictetus, Discourses
When you close your doors, and make darkness within, remember never to say that you are alone, for you are not alone; nay, God is within, and your genius is within. And what need have they of light to see what you are doing?
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Albert Einstein
If we knew what it was we were doing, it would not be called research, would it
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Sol Hurok
Get pleasure out of life...as much as you can. Nobody ever died from pleasure.
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Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
The heights by great men reached and kept were not attained by sudden flight, but they while their companions slept, were toiling upward in the night.
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Joe Paterno
Success without honor is an unseasoned dish it will satisfy your hunger, but it won't taste good.
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Japanese Proverb
Fall seven times, stand up eight.
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Jean Paul Friedrich Richter
A scholar knows no boredom.
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Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Against criticism a man can neither protest nor defend himself; he must act in spite of it, and then it will gradually yield to him.
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Lao Tzu
The best man is like water. Water is good it benefits all things and does not compete with them. It dwells in lowly places that all disdain. This is why it is so near to Tao.
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