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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Very Funny Random Quotes - 140
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William Bull Halsey
There are no extraordinary men...just extraordinary circumstances that ordinary men are forced to deal with.
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Susan Taylor
Use missteps as stepping stones to deeper understanding and greater achievement.
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So I Married an Axe Murderer
Stuart Would ya look at the size of that kid's head It's the size of a planetoid and it has it's own weather system Looks like an orange on a toothpick I'm not kidding, that boy's head is like Sputnik spherical but quite pointy at parts He'll be crying himself to sleep tonight, on his huge pillow.
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James Howell
Respect a man, he will do the more.
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Thomas a Kempis
Love flies, runs, and rejoices it is free and nothing can hold it back.
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Sir John Collins Squire, "A Random Walk in Science" compiled by R. L. Weber, edited by E. Mendoza
It did not last: the devil howling Ho! Let Einstein be! restored the status quo.
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Julius Henry Marx
Well, I thought my razor was dull until I heard his speech.
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Earvin Johnson
I like bubbles and the whole thing. That's the fun of taking a bath. (on his new Magic's Elixir Bubble Bath)
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Octavio Paz
Love is an attempt at penetrating another being, but it can only succeed if the surrender is mutual.
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Edith Hamilton
The fullness of life is in the hazards of life.
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W. C. Fields
Never give a sucker an even break.
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William Shakespeare
Now cracks a noble heart. Good night sweet prince And flights of angels sing thee to thy rest
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