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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Amusing Random Quotes - 167
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Miguel de Cervantes
Why do you lead me a wild-goose chase
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Author Unknown
Opportunities are often missed because we are broadcasting when we should be listening.
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Abraham Lincoln
Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt.
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Epicurus
He who is calm disturbs neither himself nor others.
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Nancy Mitford
I love children - especially when they cry, for then someone takes them away.
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Millard Fuller, founder and president, Habitat for Humanity International
Everyone who gets sleepy at night should have a simple decent place to lay their heads, on terms they can afford to pay.
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Leopold von Sacher-Masoch, Venus in Furs
How exquisite that gaze of yours would be if you were being whipped to death, in the last agony.
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Richard Needham
You don't marry one person you marry three . the person you think they are, the person they are, and the person they are going to become as the result of being married to you.
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John Henry Newman
Fear not that thy life shall come to an end, But rather that it shall never have a beginning.
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Sinclair Lewis
People will buy anything that is one to a customer.
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James Lileks
Ill feel that horrible feeling in my stomach you get when youve gone over to the Dark Side. But Ill be fine. Thats the good thing about the Dark Side. Eventually, your eyes adjust.
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H.L. Mencken
In the United States, doing good has come to be, like patriotism, a favorite device of persons with something to sell.
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