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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Silly Random Quotes - 162
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Miguel de Cervantes
Fortune leaves always some door open to come at a remedy.
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John F. Kennedy, "A Thousand Days," by Arthur Schlesinger Jr. [1965]
My father always told me that all businessmen were sons of bitches, but I never believed it till now. -- (Comment made 10 April 1962 in reaction to news that U.S. Steel was raising prices by $6 per ton, right after the unions negotiated a modest new contract under pressure from JFK to keep inflation down.)
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Garry Trudeau
America: the only country in the world where failing to promote yourself is regarded as being arrogant.
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Confucius
Virtue is not left to stand alone. He who practices it will have neighbors.
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Dean Gordon Brown
Engineering is not merely knowing and being knowledgeable, like a walking encyclopedia; engineering is not merely analysis; engineering is not merely the possession of the capacity to get elegant solutions to non-existent engineering problems; engineering is practicing the art of the organized forcing of technological change... Engineers operate at the interface between science and society...
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Henry David Thoreau
Men have become the tools of their tools.
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Srully D. Blotnick
What looks like a loss may be the very event which is subsequently responsible for helping to produce the major achievement of your life.
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Albert Einstein
The wirless telegraph is not difficult to understand. The ordinary telegraph is like a very long cat. You pull the tail in New York, and it meows in Los Angeles. The wireless is the same, only without the cat.
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Calvin Trillin
Math was always my bad subject. I couldn't convince my teachers that many of my answers were meant ironically.
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Hellen Keller
Many persons have a wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through self-gratification but through fidelity to a worthy purpose.
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Adela Rogers St. Johns
There is so little difference between husbands you might as well keep the first.
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Omar Khayym
Myself when young did eagerly frequent Doctor and Saint, and heard great Argument About it and about but evermore Came out by the same Door as in I went.
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