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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Very Funny Random Quotes and Sayings - 30
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John Wayne
Courage is being scared to death - but saddling up anyway.
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Margo Kaufman
The only thing worse than a man you can't control is a man you can.
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Oliver Wendell Holmes
What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.
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John Dewey
Children who know how to think for themselves spoil the harmony of the collective society which is coming where everyone is interdependent.
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Jack Handey Deep Thoughts
The old pool shooter had won many a game in his life. But now it was time to hang up the cue. When he did, all the other cues came crashing to the floor. 'Sorry,' he said with a smile.
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Charles Dickens
Whatever I have tried to do in life, I have tried with all my heart to do it well whatever I have devoted myself to, I have devoted myself completely in great aims and in small I have always thoroughly been in earnest.
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Barry Duncan
Men of the noblest dispositions think themselves happiest when others share their happiness with them.
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Jean Baudrillard
The skylines lit up at dead of night, the air-conditioning systems cooling empty hotels in the desert, and artificial light in the middle of the day all have something both demented and admirable about them the mindless luxury of a rich civilization, and yet of a civilization perhaps as scared to see the lights go out as was the hunter in his primitive night.
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Shirley Chisholm
I don't measure America by its achievement but by its potential.
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Samuel Butler
Man is the only animal that can remain on friendly terms with the victims he intends to eat until he eats them.
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Scott Ringenbach
Imagination is the reality of the dreamer.
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William F. Buckley Jr.
I would like to take you seriously but to do so would affront your intelligence.
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