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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Humour Random Quotes and Sayings - 34
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Chinese Proverb
A diamond with a flaw is worth more than a pebble without imperfections.
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John Cleese
I find it rather easy to portray a businessman. Being bland, rather cruel and incompetent comes naturally to me.
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Margaret Weis
Hope is the denial of reality.
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John Dean
You really have to experience the feeling of being with the president in the oval office. ... It's a disease I came to call Ovalitis.
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Koran, (c. 651 AD)
If you disclose your alms, even then it is well done, but if you keep them secret, and give them to the poor, then that is better still for you; and this wipes off from you some of your evil deeds.
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Manilius
When we are born we die, our end is but the pendant of our beginning.
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Amanda Bradley
Celebrate the happiness that friends are always giving, make every day a holiday and celebrate just living
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Seneca
The most onerous slavery is to be a slave to oneself.
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Plato
The price good men pay for indifference to public affairs is to be ruled by evil men.
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Andre Maurois
Above all things, never be afraid. The enemy who forces you to retreat is himself afraid of you at that very moment.
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Roald Dahl
And Charlie, don't forget about what happened to the man who suddenly got everything he ever wanted. He lived happily ever after.
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Evelyn Waugh
It is a curious thing... that every creed promises a paradise which will be absolutely uninhabitable for anyone of civilized taste.
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