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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Crazy Random Quotes and Sayings - 23
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Malcolm Stevenson Forbes
Diversity the art of thinking independently together.
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Jerry Van Amerongen, Ballard Street, 08-18-05
I feel like a tiny bird with a big song!
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Don Wood
Stupid is forever, ignorance can be fixed.
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John Guarrine
Life is God's joke on us. It's our mission to figure out the punchline.
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Elbert Hubbard
God will not look you over for medals, degrees or diplomas, but for scars.
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Luther
Human reason is like a drunken man on horseback; set it up on one side, and it tumbles over on the other.
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H. L. Mencken
And what is a good citizen? Simply one who never says, does or thinks anything that is unusual. Schools are maintained in order to bring this uniformity up to the highest possible point. A school is a hopper into which children are heaved while they are still young and tender; therein they are pressed into certain standard shapes and covered from head to heels with official rubber-stamps.
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John Fitzgerald Kennedy
The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, and spends himself in a worthy cause who at best, if he wins, knows the thrills of high achievement, and, if he fails, at least fails daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat.
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William Congreve
Defer not till tomorrow to be wise, tomorrow's sun to thee may never rise.
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Diane Ravitch
The person who knows how will always have a job. The person who knows why will always be his boss.
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Martin Van Buren, taking over from Andrew Jackson in 1837
I cannot expect to perform the task with equal ability and success.
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Timothy Leary
Civilization is unbearable, but it is less unbearable at the top.
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