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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Humorous Random Short Quotes - 195
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Seve Ballesteros
I look into their eyes, shake their hand, pat their back, and wish them luck, but I am thinking, 'I am going to bury you.
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Mahatma Gandhi
There is more to life than increasing its speed.
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Marcel Archard
When I give a lecture, I accept that people look at their watches, but what I do not tolerate is when they look at it and raise it to their ear to find out if it stopped.
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Geoffrey Latham
Music is the vernacular of the human soul.
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Unknown
Friends are those rare people who ask how you are and then wait for the answer.
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James Russell Lowell
They talk about their Pilgrim blood, Their birthright high and holy A mountain-stream that ends in mud Methinks is melancholy.
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Morrie Schwartz, Tuesdays with Morrie by Mitch Albom
Once you learn how to die, you learn how to live.
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Oprah Winfrey
Living in the moment brings you a sense of reverence for all of life's blessings.
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Marcus Tullius Cicero
Not to know what has been transacted in former times is to be always a child. If no use is made of the labors of past ages, the world must remain always in the infancy of knowledge.
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Kathe Kollwitz
I do not want to dieuntil I have faithfully made the most of my talent and cultivated the see that was placed in me until the last small twig has grown.
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Aesop, The Man and the Satyr
I will have nought to do with a man who can blow hot and cold with the same breath.
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Aleister Crowley
Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the law.
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