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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Humour Random Short Quotes - 194
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Mary Manin Morrissey
Put love first. Entertain thoughts that give life. And when a thought or resentment, or hurt, or fear comes your way, have another thought that is more powerful -- a thought that is love.
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Walter Frederick Mondale
I said I didn't want to spend most of my life in Holidays Inns, but I've checked and they've all been redecorated. They're marvelous places to stay and I've thought it over and that's where I'd like to be.
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Frederic Bastait, Letters to the Economist March 5, 2005
The state is the great ficticious entity by which everyone seeks to live at the expense of everyone else.
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Mitch Ratliffe
A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history - with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila.
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Robbie Gass
Like an ability or a muscle, hearing your inner wisdom is strengthened by doing it.
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Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
A man should hear a little music, read a little poetry, and see a fine picture every day of his life, in order that worldly cares may not obliterate the sense of the beautiful which God has implanted in the human soul.
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Robert Louis Stephenson
We are all travelers in the wilderness of this world, and the best that we can find in our travels is an honest friend.
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Steve G. Steinberg
Mosaic is the 1990's equivalent of forcing friends to sit through slides of your trip to Florida - painful for everyone but the host.
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Henry Havelock Ellis
Every man of genius sees the world at a different angle from his fellows, and there is his tragedy.
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William Hazlitt
Even in the common affairs of life, in love, friendship, and marriage, how little security have we when we trust our happiness in the hands of others
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Rod Kanehl
Baseball is a lot like life. The line drives are caught, the squibbles go for base hits. It's an unfair game.
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Italian Proverb
A wise man cares not for that which he cannot have.
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