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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Sarcastic Random Short Quotes - 176
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Buddha, The Dharmapada
We are shaped by our thoughts; we become what we think. When the mind is pure, joy follows like a shadow that never leaves.
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Buddha
Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else you are the one who gets burned.
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Johathan Edwards
Resolve to live as with all your might while you do live, and as you shall wish you had done ten thousand years hence.
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Earl of Kent, _The_Tragedy_of_King_Lear_
A knave; a rascal; an eater of broken meats; a base, proud, shallow, beggarly, three-suited, hundred-pound, filthy, worsted-stocking knave; a lily-livered, action-taking knave, a whoreson, glass-gazing, super-serviceable finical rogue; one-trunk-inheriting slave; one that wouldst be a bawd, in way of good service, and art nothing but the composition of a knave, beggar, coward, pandar, and the son and heir of a mongrel bitch: one whom I will beat into clamorous whining, if thou deniest the least syllable of thy addition.
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Robert Anson Heinlein
A competent and self-confident person is incapable of jealousy in anything. Jealousy is invariably a symptom of neurotic insecurity.
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Arnold Schwarzenegger
The mind is the limit. As long as the mind can envision the fact that you can do something, you can do it.
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G.K. Chesterton
The poets have been mysteriously silent on the subject of cheese.
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William Hazlitt
When a thing ceases to be a subject of controversy, it ceases to be a subject of interest.
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Hesiod
We know how to speak many falsehoods that resemble real things, but we know, when we will, how to speak true things.
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Tom Robbins
Maybe most people were fundamentally contradictory. The real people at any rate.
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Euripides
Love makes the time pass. Time makes love pass.
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Desiderius Erasmus
In the kingdom of the blind, the one-eyed man is king.
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