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A random selection of fabulous
funny quotations from famous writers throughout history. From our database of over
hilarious 100,000 funny quotes.
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Humorous Random Quotes and Sayings - 45
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Benjamin Franklin
After three days men grow weary of a wench, a guest, and rainy weather.
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Adam Marshall
You only live once; but if you live it right, once is enough.
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Albert Einstein
Generations to come will find it difficult to believe that a man such as Gandhi ever walked the face of this earth.
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George Santayana
Music is essentially useless, as life is but both have an ideal extension which lends utility to its conditions.
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Andrea Oldham
Smile alot Not only will you turn heads, you'll turn hearts
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Eleanor Roosevelt
Beautiful young people are accidents of nature, but beautiful old people are works of art.
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Real Live Preacher, RealLivePreacher.com Weblog, August 27, 2003
There isn’t much better in this life than finding a way to spend a few hours in conversation with people you respect and love. You have to carve this time out of your life because you aren’t really living without it.
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William Carleton
Strong feelings do not necessarily make a strong character. The strength of a man is to be measured by the power of the feelings he subdues not by the power of those which subdue him.
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Chinese Proverb
If you are patient in one moment of anger, you will escape a hundred days of sorrow.
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Lois McMaster Bujold
Never... ever suggest they don't have to pay you. What they pay for, they'll value. What they get for free, they'll take for granted, and then demand as a right. Hold them up for all the market will bear.
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Tyron Edwards
Anxiety is the rust of life, destroying its brightness and weakening its power. A childlike and abiding trust in Providence is its best preventive and remedy.
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Mark Twain
When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not.
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